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ORYou can retire to New York City where...You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can’t find Wisconsin on a map.You think Central Park is “nature.”You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.You’ve worn out a car horn. (IF you have a car.)You think eye contact is an act of aggressionORYou can retire to Minnesota where...You only have three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.Halloween costumes have to fit over parkas.You have seventeen recipes for casserole.Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.The four seasons are: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road repair.The highest level of criticism is “He is different,” “She is different,” or “It was different!”ORYou can retire to The Deep South where...You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.“Y’all” is singular and “all y’all” is. "She had it tougher when word got around that her parents couldn't afford to send her there — that her dad was 'just' a cop and she'd gotten in on a merit scholarship."She shook her head at the unpleasant memory."So the snobs looked down on her as poor white trash. The geeks and smart kids were intimidated by her scholarship, brains and looks. And the cheerleaders saw her as a threat; they made sure none of their boyfriends gave her the time of day."She did make a few friends, but she just didn't seem to get close to them. I knew one girl she hung around with, but they had a falling out between our junior and senior years. I guess her family took long vacations every summer, and she said Kendall just flat refused to tell her where they went. It kind of put her off I guess."I always made a point to stop and say hi when I ran into her. But she seemed to get more and more closed off every year."Like I said, she had it tough there."Mary's observations of Kendall fit my impressions of her.
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